The Art of Christian Suffering

Here's the real secret, I don't want any of my supporting churches to know. I'm sort of failing at the suffering missionary thing. To suffer, you really have to work at it, because life in the vine can really be fun! There's a few things here that make that really difficult:

Tortillas: Nuff said. My neighbor grinds fresh corn daily, and deftly whacks them into the slightly smoky, pungent circles. I pick them up warm. I don't even buy them from the factory tortillerias. I get the pure, fresh stuff. Daily bread? Fugettabout it!

Chocolate: I actually get the toasted cacoa beans scooped into the grinder and watch it come out as a paste. Mexicans make all sorts of delights with this, but I discovered what it does to a US brownie recipe! Yeeehaw!

Unlimited Power: When the power goes out, I don't worry about the clock. Roosty will always be there. Thanks, Roosty.

Time travel: Yes, time travel does exist. Einstein knew that already. In Mexico, you can frequently jump ahead to the end of your day just in traffic alone.  I learned in Mexico that between political protests, flooded roads, or just plain bad traffic, I can slow down time- IN MY MIND! Just put on some Toby Mac in the car and be with Jesus a little while. By the time I get to wherever I'm going, I've already spent a year in the courts of the Lord. (I am the vine, you are the branches. If you remain in me, and I in you, you will bear much fruit. Outside of me you can do nothing.) I wasn't going to accomplish anything without Jesus anyway. So maybe, he just needed me to slow down with Him a little while.

Teleportation: Elijah was transported by the Holy Spirit from one town to another. I discovered this amazing gift here, never before revealed to me in California...walking. One day, driving to the store, I realized how silly it was. I parked my car, and walked across the street to the store in record time! God teleported me using my own tennis shoes! It took 30 seconds for me to walk out my front door to the neighborhood tienda. I bought a few essentials and was teleported back by the powers of my feet! My children also have this gift. They now can teleport themselves to the neighbors tienda to pick up milk for mom.

Don't feel bad that you're not a missionary. You too, can have the gifts of unlimited power, time travel, and teleportation. I can't promise you the tortillas and chocolate. You have to sign up for those.